Stars must "check science facts".

Thomas Dolby: "I would never endorse any advanced scientific laser beam shrinking ray I did not fully understand the operating principles of myself. Don't be blinded with science!"

LONDON, Wednesday (UNN Science) — Celebrities have been asked to check their facts before lending support to scientific research and campaigns, rather than risk misleading people, says the charity Sense About Science.

Over 1400 scientists are backing the campaign, as well as many celebrities. "As a scholarship chemical engineer," said Cindy Crawford, "I could never endorse a hair product if I couldn't at least in theory design the manufacturing plant myself." And famed dropper of science MC Hawking said, "WE ARE MORE THAN AWARE THAT THEM MEDIA BITCHEZ PREFER A SHOCKING STORY OVER SOLID FACT, YO. BUT THEY'S NOT ONLY FOOLIN' THEMSELVES, THEY'S FOOLIN' US TOO. THEY GONNA GET A BRIEF HISTORY OF MY FOOT IN THEIR ASS. REAL BRIEF. WORD."

Richard Dawkins noted some difficulties facing the campaign. "My quite reasonable television advertisements concerning the matter of religions and society have had an unfortunately reactionary response in the United States. Some deluded and undoubtedly schizophrenic fundamentalists have gone so far as to object to the idea that all churches and religious organisations should be napalmed and their members stuck on spits and roasted at the town gates, and apparently I have been convicted in absentia of war crimes. Which only goes to show just how far these zealots will take things. I suppose sending them a British ten-pound note with Charles Darwin on it could be taken as having been unnecessarily provocative, but I did apologise most sincerely for having spoken above their level of stupidity."

Plans are also in progress to send David Blaine to the moon, just to cheer everyone up.

Other areas of technology already benefit from celebrity sponsorship. Microsoft, after a European Union request to work better with its competitors, has recently signed up Peter Sutcliffe, Ian Brady, Rosemary West and Charles Manson to promote Linux.

• Derren Brown "The strange case of the closet in the skeleton". BBC, January 3, 2007

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Uncyclopedia, of course. I'm trying for an UnNews a day. CC-by-nc-sa 2.0.

New MMORPG "First Life" gaining popularity.

BOOSTERISM, Techno-Utopia — It's the newest social networking fad, a place of unparalleled delights and frightening possibilities. It's First Life, a new Massively Multiplayer Offline Reality Playing Game, produced by Jehovah Labs six thousand years ago and only accelerating in popularity.

While First Life is referred to as a game, it does not have points, scores, fixed levels or an end-strategy. The environment is known to players as "The Real World." As of December 2006, over six billion users are in the World at any one time. It is famous for its ultra-realistic play and its amazing high-resolution 3-D graphics, framerate and physics engine.

In First Life, you are assigned a body type. You cannot trade it up or easily change its basic characteristics, though you can outfit it in various ways.

"It's weird," said one player. "You can hardly buy cool replacement penises anywhere. But sex in First Life is amazing. It's really hard to level up to, though, and it cost me a fortune."

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