Census meme.

2011: Living in Walthamstow with girlfriend arkady, daughter Freda, one of two teenagers and two cats. Working a job and thoroughly into the role of middle-aged suburban father.

2021: Living in recently-purchased East Grinstead religious compound with Arkady, who has entered "cult I founded" as "religion." Freda is in third year at Hogwarts and appears to be a natural Parseltongue. Everyone at school thinks she is wonderful and loves her even as she ruthlessly manipulates them as her robot meatpuppet minions. Younger formerly-teen's pop career has fallen over at the difficult fourth album. Older formerly-teen still playing Runescape. I have a side business selling sugared imaginary pain on the Internet and have learnt a second chord on guitar.

2031: Back in Melbourne because it's warmer now there's no Gulf Stream and Arkady can get away from unpleasable UK fan base and financial authorities. Freda is next Dark Lord but everyone's okay with that. The Singularity has happened, but our loving Artificial Intelligence keepers and protectors still don't understand her jokes. I still write Rocknerd and talk about records from forty years before. Carefully forgot second chord on guitar in case increased musicianship induces tolerance of Chris de Burgh. Older formerly-teen still playing Runescape.