Essential tool for dealing with tech support:

[reddragdiva]

A phrasebook telling how to say "MY HOVERCRAFT IS FULL OF EELS!" in bad Hindi.

Comments

[aca.livejournal.com]

मेरी नाव मछलीयॉ से भरी है
(Merī nāv machlīyon se bharī hai)

Apparently...

[arkady.livejournal.com]

But be careful with your pronounciation, otherwise your hovercraft is actually full of penises. (Penii?)

[reddragdiva]

You say that like it's a bug rather than a feature.

[belegdel.livejournal.com]

I'd consider that an upgrade :)

Sady I'm not sure I could pronounce the written form in any way likely to be identifiable even as bad Hindi.
I know one Hindi speaker. Trouble is I'm not sure I want to be asking my Associate Director how to say my hovercrat is full of penises.

[valkyriekaren.livejournal.com]

My postillion has been struck by lightning!

EELS ON A MOTHERFUCKING HOVERCRAFT!

[dennyd.livejournal.com]

That could be fun for dealing with Abbey phone-banking too.

[untermensch.livejournal.com]

私のホバークラフト は鰻が一杯です。

[sclerotic-rings.livejournal.com]

We have a similar phrase used when dealing with Bank of America reps: "Ah wuz conceived when Daddy tole his sister to 'put out or get out' when comin' back from the NASCAR rally..." Suddenly, they all want to be my friend, because they think we have something in common.

[seph-hazard.livejournal.com]

Muthafuckin eels on a muthafuckin hovercraft, dude.

Breathe...aaaaaand...relaaax.

Is it all a bit stressful, then? [mwah]

[seph-hazard.livejournal.com]

Damnit, dennyd beat me to it. Ahh well...

[nniaa.livejournal.com]

A phrase I often feel the need to use in a foreign language. Can we also have that in Swedish, German and French?

[reddragdiva]

Answer in the broadest South African you can and that should work just fine. It's even better for the purpose than an Australian using their best Steve Irwin.

[nniaa.livejournal.com]

Actually, come to think of it - we have far more colourful phrases *grin*

[reddragdiva]

Croikey! Fair crack o' the dingo! Chuck another whingin' Pom on the barbie! Shtroof! You need to write the equivalent of this.

[yellowrocket.livejournal.com]

Welsh: Mae fy hofrenfad lawn o llysywenau (or something like that!)

[vatine]

Swedish - "Min svävare är full av ålar" [approx 'meen sv@vare err full @v ol@r' ]

Slight lack of schwas on this here keyboard, so for the generic vowel sound, I approximated with an at-sign.