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reddragdivaThis poll on gaydar was requested by ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif){kind=small}
commonpeople, who wondered if he set people's off (consensus: he doesn't, and will have to keep namedropping his boyfriend in situations it might become an issue).
Unique snowflakes are encouraged to expand on the above in comments. Note: if married and monogamous, that doesn't necessarily make you not bi any more.
When I'm going out, I appear to be out. My straight male friends tend to greet me with a kiss. When I'm in office clothes, I barely trigger people's gothdar. (Which should be the next poll.)
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I am Something Else...
Date: 2006-01-23 05:16 pm (UTC)Re: I am Something Else...
Date: 2006-01-23 05:18 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-01-23 05:25 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-01-23 05:27 pm (UTC)Re: I am Something Else...
Date: 2006-01-23 05:29 pm (UTC)On and on the dykedar, I only seem to set off men's dykedar. I am wondering if I am doing something wrong...
(no subject)
Date: 2006-01-23 05:31 pm (UTC)I didn't actually get to see you in drag until my first Whitby; all our meetings before then usually took place whilst you were on your way home from work so you were invariably in plain black shirt and trousers. But you have a whole load of little mannerisms - the way you walk (yes, even in office wear you have a tendancy to mince!), your hand gestures, the way you sit - that all give you away, and I just picked up on them subconsciously.
That's all that gay/dykedar is, really; skill of observation raised almost to the instinctive level, where you no longer need to consciously be looking for the cues in order to be aware of them.
My dykedar isn't quite as effective as on the whole I tend to tolerate female company less well than male, so until recently (as in past 3-4 years or so) I had fewer female friends than male; and I still feel far more at ease around male friends than female. It's still pretty accurate though. More amusing to me is when I encounter someone who adamantly insists she is a lesbian when it's blatantly obvious she's only bi-curious at most - which is rather more common than you may think.
Re: I am Something Else...
Date: 2006-01-23 05:31 pm (UTC)Re: I am Something Else...
Date: 2006-01-23 06:13 pm (UTC)Ooh. There's an idea.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-01-23 06:15 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-01-23 06:16 pm (UTC)Elaboration on 'other': I'm not sure whether I'm gay or bi really. I'm almost exclusively attracted to women, but almost exclusively too terrified of rejection to ever try. Men on the other hand are usually easier to pull and sometimes look like women if you squint hard.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-01-23 06:27 pm (UTC)You don't set off my gaydar at all, fwiw. Bidar by association with a lot of them, maybe.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-01-23 06:28 pm (UTC)(Stop sniggering, you at the back there.)
(no subject)
Date: 2006-01-23 06:29 pm (UTC)Re: I am Something Else...
Date: 2006-01-23 06:30 pm (UTC)Re: I am Something Else...
Date: 2006-01-23 06:36 pm (UTC)Re: I am Something Else...
Date: 2006-01-23 06:38 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-01-23 06:39 pm (UTC)Gay/bi girls think I'm straight.
ARGHHH!
(no subject)
Date: 2006-01-23 06:40 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-01-23 06:42 pm (UTC)i got used to The Cock also, before realising my preference for girls.
so now... i can't go totally gay because there's something about The Cock that makes me melt...
(no subject)
Date: 2006-01-23 06:48 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-01-23 06:48 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-01-23 06:49 pm (UTC)Re: I am Something Else...
Date: 2006-01-23 06:51 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-01-23 06:53 pm (UTC)Re: I am Something Else...
Date: 2006-01-23 06:53 pm (UTC)