Homos roaming the streets in packs. Queer bashers with tyre-jacks. Lesbian counter-attacks.

[reddragdiva]

This poll on gaydar was requested by commonpeople, who wondered if he set people's off (consensus: he doesn't, and will have to keep namedropping his boyfriend in situations it might become an issue).

[Poll #658329]

Unique snowflakes are encouraged to expand on the above in comments. Note: if married and monogamous, that doesn't necessarily make you not bi any more.

When I'm going out, I appear to be out. My straight male friends tend to greet me with a kiss. When I'm in office clothes, I barely trigger people's gothdar. (Which should be the next poll.)

Comments

I am Something Else...

[hazyjayne.livejournal.com]

Slut.

Re: I am Something Else...

[reddragdiva]

You just wish it was tickybox instead of radio buttons.

[siani-hedgehog.livejournal.com]

i've ticked "something else". i used to happily identify as bi, but i've found that since my teens, as i've aged, my rate of attraction to women has seriously declined. i only very rarely find myself attracted to women now. *i* am okay with that, but i've been berated for continuing to identify as bi, and i think those people have a point. however, i'm also not comfortable with labelling myself as straight, because there are several women i know who i find desperately attractive. i feel much the same about poly vs monogamous distinctions.

[redshira.livejournal.com]

i only very rarely find myself attracted to women now.

I should either blame your alcohol intake at TNAC, or feel very privileged. :)

[grega.livejournal.com]

The only time I seem to have set off anyone's gaydar has been when I'm in a gay bar or club. As doglets so aptly pointed out, in a gay bar a "gothic" shirt becomes a flouncy blouse. That and I look like a cross between a bear and a leather boy ;o)

[arkady.livejournal.com]

FWIW, I "knew" you were bi the first time I met you - and you were wearing office clothes at the time, because you'd come straight to the Marlborough Head from work for a Sluts meet. diffrentcolours introduced us and you spent a lot of time hiding behind him because you were scared of me. ;-)

I didn't actually get to see you in drag until my first Whitby; all our meetings before then usually took place whilst you were on your way home from work so you were invariably in plain black shirt and trousers. But you have a whole load of little mannerisms - the way you walk (yes, even in office wear you have a tendancy to mince!), your hand gestures, the way you sit - that all give you away, and I just picked up on them subconsciously.

That's all that gay/dykedar is, really; skill of observation raised almost to the instinctive level, where you no longer need to consciously be looking for the cues in order to be aware of them.

My dykedar isn't quite as effective as on the whole I tend to tolerate female company less well than male, so until recently (as in past 3-4 years or so) I had fewer female friends than male; and I still feel far more at ease around male friends than female. It's still pretty accurate though. More amusing to me is when I encounter someone who adamantly insists she is a lesbian when it's blatantly obvious she's only bi-curious at most - which is rather more common than you may think.

[feanelwa.livejournal.com]

Bah. I'm glad you find it amusing anyway :p

Elaboration on 'other': I'm not sure whether I'm gay or bi really. I'm almost exclusively attracted to women, but almost exclusively too terrified of rejection to ever try. Men on the other hand are usually easier to pull and sometimes look like women if you squint hard.

[booklectica]

I think I look completely straight. Luckily I socialise in queer places a lot, so people can tell by that (or at least make a good guess). Otherwise I'd probably never have had any girlfriends at all.

[cyberpunkgrrl.livejournal.com]

Straight girls think I'm gay

Gay/bi girls think I'm straight.

ARGHHH!

[reddragdiva]

Wear a shirt saying "I LIKE TITS TOO"?

[h-i-p-p-y.livejournal.com]

I won't take part in the poll, cuz I set people's dyke-dar (I still call it gaydar) off always until I was 18 when I realised the full extent of my attraction to women and actually became bi... Now I rarely meet anyone who thinks I'm gay.

[secretlondon.livejournal.com]

I call it gaydar for boys and girls too. Dykedar seems very artifical somehow, I must be behind the times or something.

[wednesday]

I used to set off bidar fairly easily. These days, however, I can write entire essays about looking at tits and just get mistaken for my boyfriend. I'm not entirely sure what happened.

[ali-in-london.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure I have dykedar at all, as I tend to only spot when girls might like me. So far I've not had any false positives (i.e. tried to kiss her, she ran away screaming). Was very confused the first time one particular girl of our mutual aquaintance tried flirting with me, but that wasn't so much that I was surprised that she liked girls but more that her boyfriend was upstairs at the time which made things a little weird at the time.

No-one's ever told me that I set off their dykedar, but neither has anyone been incredibly surprised when they found out that I'm not straight.

[ex-unagothae16.livejournal.com]

If I've ever set off anybody's any-dar, I don't know about it.

I am blissfully ignorant of sexuality.

There are just people I want to hang with and people you'd have to buy me drinks to hang with and people you couldn't pay me to hang with.

I'm celibate these days, so straight/bi doesn't really matter, but I just can't take my eyes off of Drew Barrymore and Tilda Swinton (stop sniggering!) I don't know if that's a sexual thing or not.

Crushes have never been about who I'd do if I had the chance. It's all about the thrill of the thought of hanging out with someone who talks like that. *shrug*

I'd say I'm asexual, but I've been told I'm sex on legs and, apparently, my voice is a sexual force to be reckoned with.

Frankly, I'm still confused :P

[neenaw.livejournal.com]

A lot of people used to think I was a lesbian. I think it was because I had shaved hair with just a little orange fringe at the front.

[reddragdiva]

And had a girlfriend!

[fluffymormegil.livejournal.com]

I... Well, actually, I don't know whether I set people's gaydar (or whatever) off or not. Nobody ever tells me.

[bluehelen.livejournal.com]

I honestly don't know if I set off anybody's anything-dar. If have spent enough time with a person to have bothered noticing that they fancy me (quite a long time, usually) I genrally assume that by that point they know me well enough to know my preferences.
That said it would be kind of interesting to know how complete strangers view me, so feel free to ask around amongst the people who haven't met next B Movie or something!

[adrasteah.livejournal.com]

No woman has ever hit on me, ever! I don't know what that says about me though.

[bar-bar-ella.livejournal.com]

My response to the third question would really be "I actually have no idea 'cos people tend not to say anything about it to me".

[bar-bar-ella.livejournal.com]

Oh, and hey, did my poll response actually lodge just then?

[zotz]

I knew you were reminding me of something.

Now I remember.

[m0rbid-princess.livejournal.com]

Girls tend to think I'm gay, or at least bi, which I'm barely if at all. About the most common thing I'm asked in clubs, other than my name, is "do you like girls or what?":) I don't seem to set off boys' gaydars much at all.

[reddragdiva]

If I hadn't met you with your girlfriend I'd assume you were gay as a gay thing!

[damned-colonial.livejournal.com]

I dunno about setting off the dykedar. I kinda assumed yes, but then I get things like my hairdresser repeatedly asking me if I've found a boyfriend yet, so who the hell knows?

[reddragdiva]

I think yours used to be a lot stronger, yes!

Holy crap!

[grumpy-sysadmin.livejournal.com]

I have, quite honestly, not recognized a single lyric fragment in your subject lines until this one, so our musical interest cross-section consists exclusively of Nick Cave, so far.

Re: Holy crap!

[reddragdiva]

I've been using Nick Cave since last November!

[ciphergoth.livejournal.com]

I don't think I'm a unique snowflake in wanting "I don't know" options for the first three questions!

[reddragdiva]

I can answer the third one for you, if it'll help: YOU ARE AN OBVIOUS GREAT BIG GIRLY POOFTAH even when you're out with a girl. How's that?

Oh Dear

[damnu2hell.livejournal.com]

well Im the one whose been known in slimelight as "the lesbian ice bitch" ?! a
And there is only one word in that sentence thats true. Could it be that whenever any guy is trying to chat me up Im far too fucked to care or be bothered? So in order to stroke their egos they come up with that line... Im strictly Dickly.....

Re: Oh Dear

[reddragdiva]

"Lesbian ice bitch"?!