Raisin her host of hair from her crooks.

I've just been reminded (by a post of mofette's) of a friend of my ex-fiancee who would speak of keeping a bottle opener hooked by a chain to her clit piercing so she could open bottles at parties by putting them up under her skirt and fiddling a bit. I don't know if she ever actually did this. I do know she did the one where she would go to nightclubs with a water-pistol full of water and another full of urine and squirt people with the one they deserved. "What can I say, it was Canberra."

On a cold and grey Chicago morn.

I am forced to admit that my lovely new Future Designs Neo/Matrix-styled leather coat ([1], [2]) really is just too big for me. It's a size XXL and it falls off my shoulders. Bother.

I paid £300 for it a few weeks ago. If anyone of somewhat larger shoulders and/or chest would like to buy it from me, they can have it for £280. Or if you buy an XL, I'll swap it for this one and make up the difference in cost (they're everywhere, it seems, usually for £300-350) plus twenty quid for it being slightly worn.

Happy Jew Year!

It's Jewish New Year and we're at ruthi and oscarhocklee's place, eating ceremonial apples and honey and drinking copious earthly beer. I have had smoked beer (Rauchbier), cherry beer, Honeydew, Rochefort 10 and Fraoch heather beer. Liz survived De Koninck, her first beer in a week. Arkady had the Fraoch and Rochefort 10. Shana tovah!

Today has been frantic in its way. Neo is shitting copiously, having crapped on Liz's T-shirt and in a plastic bag in the spare room. He gets full points for actually crapping in a plastic bag. I've been carefully rationing his meat so he doesn't pig out.

Cookie's laptop is a 17" Vaio. It's a desktop replacement, i.e., you could put four legs on it and use it as a desk. 1920×1200, running Breezy beta. We tried putting my coat on him; it was comically small and has no hope of ever crossing his chest. I'm still keen to try it on Ingvar, Landmine and Lars.

I think I shall fall over very happily in a short while. Yes.